


Shades of Grey

by ParadiseAvenger



Category: Darker Than Black
Genre: F/M, Vanilla
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-16
Updated: 2013-03-16
Packaged: 2017-12-05 12:10:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/723149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ParadiseAvenger/pseuds/ParadiseAvenger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events in Tokyo, Hei and Yin are forced to flee. In hiding, they become closer than possible for a Contractor and a Doll, but it was all they had left. Just each other. "Hei, black or white?" Yin had asked and it started everything. HeiXYin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. It's Safe Here, Hei

Please, check out my first ORIGINAL NOVEL! **The Breaking of Poisonwood by Paradise Avenger.** (Summary: People were dead. When Skye Davis bought me at a slave auction as a birthday present for his brother, I had no idea what my new life was going to be like, but I had never expected this. It all started when Venus de Luna was killed and I was to take her place, to become the new savior… Then, bad things happened and some people died. In the heart of the earth, we discovered the ancient being that Frank Davis had found and created and used to his advantage. The Poisonwood—)

…

Takes place after Season One (Kuro no Keiyakusha) of the anime, but before Season Two (Ryuusei no Gemini)—in that little space between where Hei and Yin are together (Gaiden). Spoiler warning for the first season. Other than that, it’s all good!

**X:Shades:X:of:X:Grey:X**

_Under the best of circumstances, Hei was lovable. Under the worst of circumstances, he was likable. (As a testimony to that, even after the police woman Misaki Kirihara had discovered that the sweet young exchange student Li Shengshun was really the Black Reaper, BK-201, she had been unable to shoot him in the back to take him down.) Because of that, it was no surprise that the shadowy syndicate chose Hei for this mission and many others that required a sweet inconspicuous personality._

_The woman’s name then was Luciella Le Blanc._

_When he did dream, though he denied it, the things they did together were the subject of a few of his nightmares._

_But that was a long time ago and a lot of things had happened since then. Amber had prevented Hell’s Gate from being destroyed at the cost of her life, Mao had lost his consciousness to the cat since they had abandoned the syndicate, Huang had bought Hei and Amber the time they needed at his own life as well, and Hei had glimpsed his sister in the space between worlds. A lot of things had happened, a lot of people had died, and there was a lot he wished he could take back._

_But not a single Contractor had the power to turn back time and even if they did, he suspected the Obeisance would be too great for them to pay._

_Time travel was for immortals and fools, after all, and Contractors were neither._

_So, Hei had no choice to continue with the way his life had turned out._

_He was alone except for the Doll, Yin, who was forever at his side like his miniature shadow the color of bruises. She watched over water, watched over him, and watched over the world as it passed outside the window. Even though she was just a Doll, sometimes he felt that she was far more human than he was. Even if she had to use her fingers to make herself smile, even if his rational mind insisted that she was only a Doll… Yin was all he had left in the world._

_Everything else had been taken from him—his sister, his first love, his human mind and body, and even his job._

…X:X:X…

Night had fallen on Okinawa. 

The endless wine-dark ocean was outside the cool glass of the window, washing endlessly against the grey-white strip of sand that made up the small beach. The sky was dark, the fake stars gleaming with the lives of the Contractors. The real moon and stars had vanished so long ago that she was growing used to the sight, but it was troubling to look up at the fake sky. The sky was something that should have been constant, but it was gone—just completely gone.

Yin’s pale magenta eyes tried to pick out Hei’s star in the false sky, but she couldn’t find it even after several minutes of searching. Her vision wasn’t the best to begin with. Since she was a child, her vision had been failing. Her eyes were plagued with cataracts and, though she wasn’t completely blind, she was painfully nearsighted. And since Hei was sleeping, his star wasn’t very bright to begin with. Even when he was at the height of his powers, his star was still dim.

It was as if even the star knew that Hei was still had his human soul even though he was a Contractor. 

He was an anomaly. 

He was both.

He was everything. 

The Doll gave up searching out Hei’s star and turned in her chair by the window to look at her sleeping companion. Hei’s pale face was smooth with sleep. His ink-black hair looked like coal on cream, spread across the white pillow case and feathered against his sallow cheeks. There was a small bandage on his cheekbone and dark circles under his deep blue eyes. His lids fluttered slightly in his sleep and she suspected he was dreaming again even though he denied it.

Suddenly, Hei lurched up in the bed, hands fisted in the sheets tightly, his mouth half-open in a scream.

The dark starlight played over his body, the shadows pooling in his collarbones and the fine bones of his throat and falling across his dark blue eyes. His body was thin and fragile-looking. His bare chest was wrapped tightly in white bandages, heaving for breath as the vestiges of his dream clung to him. For a long moment, he just sat there until his breathing finally returned to normal. Then, he pushed his dampened hair out of his face and took a deep breath to steady himself.

“Hei,” Yin said softly.

He looked at her. “What?”

“Were you dreaming?” she asked.

He shook his head. “Contractors don’t dream.”

Yin didn’t respond. Instead, she turned her gaze back out the window at the glowing white ghost of the beach beyond the glass. Hei swung his legs out of bed and came to sit in the chair across from Yin. They were so close that his bare knees just touched hers. In his black shirt and shorts, he looked almost sickly, but Yin looked that way too. They were almost like twins in the night—both pale and slender and beaten and broken hearted.

“You can go to sleep if you want, Yin,” Hei said suddenly.

She turned her pale eyes to him, stared at him for a long moment, and then nodded. She stood from the chair at the window and crossed the room in her bare feet. Before they fled to Okinawa, they had stopped quickly to buy new clothes, but she didn’t have any pajamas. They had been in too much of a hurry at the time so she had been wearing one of Hei’s black tank tops. She now took a clean one from his bag and held it against her chest for a moment as if hesitating. 

He wondered why. She had never hesitated before. 

Then, in the way that only a Doll could, she stripped down to her panties right in front of him and pulled on the shirt. Hei politely averted his eyes, keeping his gaze out the window so he wouldn’t see her creamy thighs or the swell of her small breasts. He didn’t turn his head until he heard her slide between the sheets that were probably still warm from his body and get comfortable. (1) She pulled the ribbon from her hair and set it in a small pool in the night stand for the next day.

“Hei,” she murmured in the darkness.

“Hmm?” 

“You won’t go and leave me alone, right?” she asked softly.

“No,” he said.

She was quiet for another moment and he relaxed listening to her soft breathing. 

“Hei,” she said again.

“You should sleep, Yin,” he told her.

She shook her head, silver-violet hair feathering on the pillows and framing her thin shoulders. “I can’t,” she said.

“I’m sure you can,” he said patiently. 

She shook her head stubbornly. “I want Hei to admit that he was dreaming.”

He sighed. “Contractors don’t dream, Yin.”

“Neither do Dolls,” was all she said. Her pale eyes seemed to glow in the dark, watching him.

Hei turned his gaze back out the window and didn’t respond, even though she continued to watch him for a long time before finally falling asleep. Outside, the umbrellas on the beach that looked like sweet hard candies during the day looked like dangerous night-blooming flowers under the darkness of the fake sky. His eyes sought out his own star and then looked away into the endless ocean.

…X:X:X…

One of the hardest things about being on the run and having to blend in was that Hei couldn’t eat his fill. He could usually eat enough for ten people and lately, he had to eat just enough for one. It didn’t even matter that Yin ate as much as a mouse and he got to finish what was on her plate. His stomach growled fiercely and he pressed a hand to it, cursing inwardly, as he stared out the window. Pathetically, he even felt a little weak since it had been so long since he had eaten enough to sustain his body.

“Hei,” Yin murmured. 

He turned to face her, lowering his hand from his empty stomach. She was standing at the door in her pale blue sundress, wide-brimmed straw hat, and white sandals just waiting patiently for him. They had to keep up the ruse of being a young newlywed couple on their honeymoon so it was time for their twice-daily walk on the beach—once in the morning and once as dusk was falling. Her pale eyes went right into him and he sensed that she knew he was starving, but she didn’t say anything about it.

“I’m coming,” he said to her.

She inclined her head slightly, silvery-violet hair kissing her cheeks, and stretched out her hand. Hei took it more out of habit than anything else, but Yin’s fingers tightened oddly on his. Yet he didn’t remark on that either, just like she hadn’t said a word about his growling stomach. They had that kind of relationship—they were so used to being together that they hardly needed the words between them anymore. Actually, it probably had more to do with the fact that Yin was a Doll and Hei was a Contractor.

“Let’s go,” Hei murmured and tugged lightly on her hand.

The beach was a small strip of white sand, cast in deep shadow only by the palm trees and hard-candy-colored umbrellas. Farther up the beach, there was a driftwood log that looked as if it had fallen from a sailing ship thousands of years ago. By now, it was twisted and snarled and barely even resembled a tree anymore, but it was there anyway. Hei figured it was like his humanity. He had been twisted and bent by the things he had done, but he was still human. 

He sat down on the log, patient, because Yin always stood at the edge of the ocean as if in a state of awe.

It was probably because Yin’s Observer Spirits watched the world through the water and the ocean was the largest source of water anywhere. She probably had a Spirit observing the other side of the world at that very moment. He smiled as she knelt to pick up a whorled conch and pressed it to her ear. She didn’t smile and her face remained blank, but he saw the small play of bright happy emotion in her pale eyes. Even though she was a Doll, she had feelings and emotions and made decisions on her own. 

The cool salt water lapped against her thighs, wetting the hem of her dress, but she continued to stand there.

He was about to call out to her that the tide was coming in when Yin turned and walked barefoot through the sand towards him. She held out the pink and white conch and Hei took it gingerly from her. For a moment, he studied the conch in his hands and then pressed it against the shell of his ear because she was still staring at him. For a moment, he listened to the false echo of the ocean inside the shell. Once he did this, she pressed one finger to her cheek and lifted the corner of her mouth in half a smile.

“Yin?” he asked.

She shook her head, put her sandals back on, and began to walk away from him. He set the conch delicately down beside the twisted log, stood up, and hurriedly followed her. She reached for his hand and squeezed his fingers tightly again. Her grip was surprisingly strong, damp and cool with the ocean water, but still heated with the life beneath her skin. As before, he didn’t say anything and they walked back to the hotel together in silence.

Hei unlocked the door to their room.

Yin went to the window immediately. Outside on the small balcony, there was a basin of water where her Observer Spirit had been watching over everything in their absence. Then, the pale blue human-shaped apparition vanished. “It’s safe here,” Yin told Hei.

He nodded slightly and sat down on the bed. He was hungry and he was exhausted.

“You should rest, Hei,” Yin murmured.

“I’m alright,” he lied.

“You’ve been fighting since we left Tokyo. It’s safe here,” was all she said.

There was a knock on the door. Hei jolted, his blue eyes racing to the door, but Yin didn’t even move. It almost looked as if she wasn’t breathing. The knock came again and the manager’s voice came through the door. “Room service.”

Hei slid his eyes to Yin.

“It’s safe here,” she repeated.

He opened the door and smiled at the manager. “Yes?”

“Your wife ordered food for you,” the manager said and proceeded to push the entire cart into their room. “This is everything, isn’t it?” he asked Yin.

She nodded, her face expressionless, but Hei choked on his tongue.

The manager smiled at them, turned, and left.

Hei whirled on Yin. “What did you say when you ordered?”

“Enough for ten people,” she said plainly, her pale eyes meeting his without hesitation.

“Yin,” he said, exasperated, “We’re supposed to be blending in. No one eats this much.”

“You do,” she said softly and then lifted the silver lid on a large plate of fried rice. 

The wonderful scent of food assaulted Hei and he pressed a hand to his stomach to try to keep it from growling like some kind of animal. He tried to glare at her, but he couldn’t. he felt weak at the sight of so much food and at the thought of being able to eat as he usually did.

“It’s safe here,” Yin said one final time. “Please, eat, Hei.”

He sank down on the bed, looking from her to the uncovered food and back again. Then, with a sigh that was only partially upset and mostly relief, he lifted a plate of fried rice and began to eat. Yin came to sit beside him, delicately picking up her chopsticks, selected a small piece of sesame chicken, and daintily ate. They sat in silence together, Yin picking neatly at a few morsels of food and Hei finishing everything else. For the first time in a long time, he was finally completely full.

When they finished eating, Yin suggested he rest and he listened to her. He stripped out of his jeans and green shirt, laying both over the back of the chair Yin was sitting in. He pulled on the tank top she had worn to bed the night before because it was folded neatly on the pillow, crawled between the sheets, and slept soundly for several hours. Yin sat beside her sleeping companion’s bedside, watching over him and the world outside the window.

He hadn’t realized then that she was no longer a Doll, not to him at least. 

She had already realized that Hei was far more than a Contractor to her, but she didn’t know how to act on it. 

All they knew was that they were at least together when everything else had been taken from them. Hei had lost everyone and everything he had ever loved. Yin had lost the piano and her family and even her emotions with those things. And they were both strange. Hei was a Contractor with a human heart and Yin was a Doll full of human emotions.

And, maybe, she somehow loved him even being a Doll.

And, maybe, once the pallor of death and the pain of destruction slid from his shoulders, he would love her too.

**X:Shades:X:of:X:Grey:X**

(1) I know in the anime, their room has two beds, but wouldn’t it be strange for a married couple on their honeymoon to have two beds? And they’re pretending to be married so that they blend in so that didn’t make much sense to me. I decided to change it!

Quite the long chapter! Phew! But I’m still not done…

Questions, comments, concerns?


	2. Black or White?

Forever a Fan: Thank you so much for the awesome review. I’m glad your eyes are being opened to some of my favorite manga. If you like spooky stuff, you should really check out Ghost Hunt. It’s one of my favorite mangas! And the anime is pretty spectacular, too (but it follows the manga to a T so it’s not really necessary to do both).

**X:Shades:X:of:X:Grey:X**

Hei woke with a start in the middle of the night, a cry trapped in his throat as he lurched up in the bed. Yin had been sitting on the edge of the mattress, gently touching him as the nightmare raged inside his mind, trying to comfort him. With the vestiges of the dream still clinging to him, he lashed out at her wildly, like some kind of feral animal. His hand cracked painfully across her face, then his fingers dug harshly into her tender flesh, and the pulse of his powers blazed through his blood. 

Yin’s pale eyes met his. Even now, when he was inches away from killing her, she didn’t look afraid. Her face was completely blank of all expression, her thin bare shoulders curled in nervously told a different story though. Hei realized that he had his hands on Yin’s throat and quickly pulled away, panting desperately for breath. Yin lifted one small hand to press to her reddened cheek and the other to touch her bruised throat. Now, a small dusting of fear touched her eyes as she winced in pain.

“Hei,” she breathed.

“Yin,” he gasped. “I’m so sorry!”

Hei reached out for her, but she pulled away.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered again, pleadingly. “Yin, please…”

She allowed him to pull her body flush against his bare chest, cradling her tightly.

He stroked her pale silvery-violet hair, rocking her in his arms. “I’m sorry. I didn’t recognize you.”

“You were dreaming,” Yin murmured. Her small fingers gently touched his naked chest, absently stroking the path of his defined muscles.

He opened his mouth to protest, but then shook his head. “I was,” he confessed to the Doll in his arms. It became apparent than that Yin was the only person he would ever trust so completely.

“What are the dreams about?” she asked softly, fingering the waistband of his boxers before letting her hand glide back up to trace the line of his collarbone.

Hei rested his cheek on the top of her head. “Things that happened to me a long time ago,” he confessed softly into her hair.

Silently, Yin continued to recline in his strong arms, still touching his bare flesh gently with her fingertips.

“It was one of the first missions the Syndicate sent me on,” he told her.

Yin nestled against him, listening to his heartbeat.

He hesitated, biting his lower lip.

“Hei,” she breathed.

“Yin,” he whispered and then hesitated again. He wet his lips nervously, spent another small moment worrying his lower lip, and then heaved in a deep breath. He tightened his long arms around Yin’s small body as if he feared she would run from him if he spoke and buried his face in her pale hair. He inhaled the scent of her skin and hair, beginning to calm as he did so. Then, finally, he whispered, “The woman’s name was Luciella Le Blanc.”

The Doll’s eyes shone in the darkness, pale with cataracts. “Hei,” she whispered and he felt as if his name meant a lot more in that moment between them.

He rested his chin on her thin shoulder, breathing deeply before continuing. “Luciella had information that the Syndicate needed. I was still just a kid, but she liked her lovers to be young and beautiful and I have…” he bit the corner of his mouth, “this face and this body.”

Yin’s fingernails dug into his skin, her small mouth opening in a small circle of shock.

Hei shook his head, dark hair feathering against his pale cheeks. “My first… everything was with her,” he whispered into Yin’s hair. “My first kiss, my first time, everything. And she was… not the most gentle or attractive woman. I begged the Syndicate to remove me from the mission after she had sex with me that first time, but they told me to figure out a way to deal with it. The sooner I got the information, the sooner I could leave her bed.”

He took another shuddering breath to steady his nerves, his fingers gripping Yin’s small shoulders like a lifeline as he spoke. “I had to train my body,” he confessed. “I had to teach myself to stay hard, even when he was hurting me or when all I could think about was leaving.” He closed his dark blue eyes tightly, his mouth twisting with half-remembered pain. “Once I got the information from her and left, she revealed herself to be a Contractor and came after me.”

Hei squeezed Yin’s soft yielding body tightly against his own, squeezing his legs together tightly as if that would repress the feelings of violation that swam back to the surface of his heart. “When I wouldn’t go back to her house with her, Luciella decided to…” He broke off, his fingers digging into Yin’s pale shoulders until she winced in pain. He loosened his grip, but didn’t let her go, still clinging to her desperately. “She was the first person I ever killed. I couldn’t let her do that to me and she would have been able to… because of how I trained my body to be…”

“You dream about that?” Yin asked softly. She turned slightly in his arms so she could look at him, but he held her firmly so that her back was against his chest and she couldn’t. With a small soft sigh, Yin reached behind herself and laid her palm against his cheek.

He covered her hand with his own, the calluses on his palms from fighting for both their lives were rough on her soft skin. “I think they would be more accurately called nightmares,” he paused, “if I were human…”

A gentle understanding silence spread between them. Outside the windowpane, there was the endless sound of the sea, so peaceful that they hardly even heard it unless they listened closely. The false stars glimmered in the dark sky, sparkling with the lives of the Contractors. It was quiet and calm, especially between Contractors and Dolls that were capable of understanding each other on such a deep level that they seemed almost the same.

“Are they about killing her?” Yin asked him suddenly.

“No,” Hei murmured, holding her tightly. 

“Do you ever dream, I mean,” she asked, “have nightmares about the people you’ve killed?”

Hei wet his lips, hesitated, and then shook his head. “Not often. Mainly, it’s about what Luciella and I—” he broke off, biting his lip. For a moment, he struggled to find the words, but couldn’t.

She pressed her fingertip to his soft lips. “You don’t have to say it,” the Doll whispered.

“Thanks,” Hei whispered and loosened his arms around her thin figure. 

Yin turned carefully in his lap as if his body was unspeakably fragile and injured, resting her cheek against his naked chest and relishing the warmth of his bare skin, and gently cupped his face once again. Her hand felt so small and cool on his heated skin. Hei wrapped his arms around her, holding her close. Her pale half-seeing eyes shone in the darkness, staring up at him and so full of emotion that it didn’t seem possible for her to be a Doll. She was too human, too much like Hei, but then also nothing like him. 

They were two sides of a coin—not touching, never meeting eye to eye, never truly seeing each other—but always together and that was enough to make them worth something.

…X:X:X…

When they finally slid apart, Hei surrendered the bed to Yin and went to sit in the chair by the window. As she always did, Yin stripped of her clothes down to her panties and pulled his tank top on over her head. The chill of the material made her small nipples stand out, but she slid beneath the covers before Hei took notice and nestled into the warmth left behind by his body. She sighed softly, watching Hei through her lashes until the quicksilver bridge of sleep finally reached out to her through the darkness and spirited her away into dreams.

She looked so much like a child, Hei thought.

Her pale silver-violet hair reminded him so much of the petals of a night-blooming flower, her pale peaches-and-cream complexion, and her pale rose-colored eyes all made her seem like a child’s paper doll being dressed up to play different parts. And she was a Doll after all. But lying in the bed like that, her hands resting in front of her face and her long hair spreading like water on the pillows, she was so beautiful and so frail that he just wanted to wrap her in his arms and never let her go.

“Yin,” he whispered.

She didn’t stir, sleeping peacefully, her breathing soft and even.

“Yin,” he murmured again.

Still, she remained sleeping and Hei smiled pleasantly. 

Gently, he brushed some of her pale hair from her cheek. Her skin was so soft and warm, delicate as the wings of a butterfly beneath his fingertips and for a moment he feared his rough hands would bruise her, but she only nuzzled into his hand in sleep.

“Yin.”

Her lips were slightly parted, moist, petal-pink, and inviting him. He had never once wanted to kiss someone before, not the way he wanted to kiss her now. Kissing Yin would get him no information nor would it save her life by posing her as his girlfriend nor would he give her pleasure since she was sleeping so deeply, yet Hei wanted this. He wanted just to feel her life against his mouth and breathe her into his aching soul. He had been alone for far too long and he wanted to feel her touch.

“Yin,” he said one final time.

He wanted to give her a chance to wake up and tell him, ‘No,’ but she didn’t stir. In fact, she shifted slightly so that her mouth was even more accessible, mumbling softly in her deep slumber. She was so beautiful and fair and right there in front of him. If he kissed her, she would never have to know.

He leaned in, his lips just barely touching hers.

“Hei,” she breathed.

He lurched back, his cheeks heating with the characteristic embarrassment he reserved for Li Shengshun. “Y-Yin,” he gasped.

She was lying on her back, looking at him, pale eyes gleaming, but she didn’t say anything else. Her arms were resting on top of the covers, arms lean and pale and as thin and bird’s wings. Then, slowly, she just closed her eyes and waited.

Hei stared at her, uncomprehending.

Still, Yin waited there, patient in the way only a Doll could be.

Then, Hei once again leaned forward and brushed his lips so lightly over hers. She angled her chin, lifting her mouth to press closer to his. He felt that she had been alone to long, too. She wanted to breathe him in as well to take away some of her pain. Until that moment, he hadn’t realized that Dolls could even feel pain. Her arms went around his naked back, pulling him closer, and his arms slipped beneath her body to crush her to him. Almost desperately, Yin opened her mouth and kissed him so that he could taste her. He welcomed her into him and they kissed for what felt like an eternity.

Then, Hei separated from her. “Yin,” he began, but couldn’t find the words.

She lay back against the pillows, her lips swollen from his kiss. “It’s alright,” she whispered in the darkness.

He glanced at her and she looked so beautiful like that in their shared bed.

“It’s safe here,” she explained. Then, watching him closely, she whispered, “It’s alright if I do those things with you. There’s no one else I’d want to be with.”

“Yin,” he breathed.

But she closed her eyes again and lay there, waiting, without speaking another word. Hei bent over her prone body, supporting his weight on his palms. Her sweet breath teased his skin, patient, and—dare he even think the word—caring. He kissed her again and Yin pressed the length of her body up against him. Her thin arms hugged him close, pulling and encouraging him until he fell beside her on the bed. Then, she nestled against him, content.

“I want to be like this with you, Hei, just you…”

He held her close, cradling her.

It was then that she asked him. “Hei?”

“Hmm?” he asked, his mind hazy with her kiss and his exhaustion.

“Would you choose black or white?”

His blue eyes snapped open sharply. “What?”

**X:Shades:X:of:X:Grey:X**

Watching Darker than Black really makes you think… What would the world be like if you looked up at the sky and knew that it was fake? The stars are supposed to be constant and I think we take simple things like that for granted. Imagine never seeing the moon again or the big dipper… It’s heavy, right?

Questions, comments, concerns?

Anyone who’s enjoying this story and wants it faster, know that I do NOT update until I have at least ONE review for the chapter I posted. So, if you want it faster REVIEW!


	3. A Shade of Grey

This will be the final installation of this story. 

Finally, the meaning of the title is revealed. In case you didn’t know, titles are very important to me. I don’t just title things all willy-nilly. They have to have a purpose and a reason and an explanation! So there!

**X:Shades:X:of:X:Grey:X**

Hei’s heart skipped a beat. How could Yin ask him that? She knew what he was—a Contractor, a killer, a monster, a demon that had escaped from Hell’s Gate. He had blood all over his hands, so much that it had seeped into every inch of his body and oozed out of his very soul. When it came to the question of black or white, light or darkness, heaven or hell, she knew exactly what side of that line in the sand he stood on. And it wasn’t the good side of that line—it wasn’t white, it wasn’t light, and he wasn’t going to heaven.

“Black,” he breathed. He wanted to push her away, but he also wanted to hold her body close when they were alone like this in their shared room.

Yin shook her head, her hands pressing against his bare chest to feel his heartbeat. “What would you choose, Hei, if you could?”

He took a deep breath. “Yin, you know what I am and what I’ve done. Contractors are killers,” he said. “Black.”

Again, she shook her head and wet her lips. “If you could do it again, what would you choose?”

Hei considered her a moment, looking down at her nestled in his arms. Without hesitation, he had killed to protect her and himself and his friends. If faced with the same situation again, even with his human mind, he would still not hesitate to kill someone to protect what was precious to him. 

With a small shake of his head, he replied again, “Black.”

“Why not white?” she asked softly.

“I’m a killer, Yin, and I would do it again in a heartbeat,” he said and squeezed her close.

“But why not choose white? You don’t like to kill, do you?”

Hei closed his eyes. “No… I don’t, but it’s something I have to do. Something I’ve been forced to do…”

“So why not white?” she breathed.

“I’m not a white person, Yin.”

“But you’re not all black either,” she said to him.

He sighed. “So what, Yin? What color are you?”

Without hesitation, she replied, “Grey.”

Hei’s blue eyes glimmered in the darkness between them. “Grey?” he repeated.

Yin nodded, her pale hair tickling his face. “Not white, but not black either,” she said softly. “I think that Hei is a shade of grey.”

Thoughtfully, he whispered, “Grey?”

She caressed the line of muscles in his abdomen, silently letting him consider her words. Hei’s fingers stroked her back, fingering the edge of the tank top she wore, but he never advanced his touch into something sexual. Together in that bed, they were just that—together.

“What shade of grey, Yin?”

She hummed in her throat. “Right in the middle,” she murmured. “Not white, but not black either. Just grey…”

Hei held her close. “Thank you, Yin,” he whispered, “for everything.”

She pressed a finger to the side of her mouth and smiled at him. He leaned towards her face and kissed the place where her finger was pressed into a smile. She lifted her hand to cup his face, holding him close so she could kiss him again. Hei’s warm strong body was pressed against her cool frail one, his hot mouth devouring her essence. Her small limbs wrapped all around his body like the petals of a flesh flower and Hei cradled her close like his precious blossom. 

He kissed her.

She kissed back.

Even though Hei was a Contractor, dangerous and bloodstained, he didn’t want to make the first move and risk hurting Yin. He was so sweet and sensitive, caring and gentle, tenderly kissing and holding her against his naked chest. So, Yin touched him first because she didn’t have those humanistic fears in her heart like he did. She was only a Doll, her fingers being the only way she could smile at him. Her small hands gingerly explored his chest and then ran over his sharp hipbones. 

He breathed her name.

“Hei,” she murmured.

Yin’s small hands continued on their path, gently cupping his buttocks and pulling his hips down against hers. She rubbed her bare legs against the eager arousal she felt growing at his body’s core, relishing the soft moans that escaped his mouth and flowed into her. Then, she had dredged up the courage and desire to grip him securely through his boxers. Hei groaned, pulled his mouth from hers, and suckled the side of her throat. When a small cry escaped her, he gently licked the soft skin on her neck, tasting the pulse of life beneath her pale flesh.

“Yin, you don’t… have to…” he murmured as she began to stroke him.

“I want to be with Hei,” she whispered, “like husband and wife.”

“Yin,” he breathed, gasping as she touched him.

“Don’t you want to?” she asked.

“Yes,” he said softly.

“Hei.”

Then, he gently cupped the wet heat between her thighs, stroking her gently through her thin cotton panties. Yin wanted to reach beneath the fabric of his boxers and feel his soft skin, but his touch distracted her too much. She threw her head back against the pillows, a small cry of bliss escaping her mouth. She had never felt so completely alive as she did at that moment. She felt like a true human, not just a Doll. Hei always made her feel that way, but this… this was different.

“Yin, may I touch you?” he breathed.

“Please,” was all she managed.

Tenderly, he pulled her panties down her sleek white legs and set them on the chair beside the bed. Then, he peeled the tank top over her head, watching her pale hair spread across the sheets. She rolled over to face him, desperately pressing her body against him as if suddenly embarrassed by her nudity. Hei shushed her, running his hands down her naked back until she relaxed against his bare chest. He could feel the press of her warm breasts and her nipples on his skin.

“It’s okay,” he murmured. “We can stop anytime you want.”

She shook her head. “Please, Hei. I want you to…”

He ran his hands down her side, raising goose bumps all over her bare milk-white skin with his heated touch. Then, he threaded one hand through her pale hair and pulled her face to his, kissing her passionately so that she wouldn’t have a chance to become self-conscious again. Gently, he touched her sleek wet folds. She gasped, her arms tightening around his body and pulling him close. She was so sensitive and sweet, virginal.

“Yin, is this…?” he asked.

“Hei,” she gasped.

He slipped one finger into her tight channel, feeling her virgin barrier resist him. He wanted her to be comfortable and gently began stroking the sensitive place inside her until she was squirming against his naked chest in pleasure. She clutched the sheets desperately in her small hands, her hips lifting to meet his touch pleadingly. Hei let his mouth wander from her lips to her throat and began to gently place open-mouthed kisses on her collarbones. 

“Yin, I’m going to…” he murmured.

“Yes,” she gasped.

Gently, he wrapped his lips around her nipple and suckled gently. He used his teeth just enough to bring her pleasure, never to hurt her, until she was gasping his name like it was the only word she knew. His other hand began to massage her breast gently, his thumb brushing over her hardened peak so that she writhed in pleasure against him. When she was putty in his hands, he kissed a path down to her bellybutton and gently dipped his tongue in. She shivered, murmuring lightly, and threading her fingers through his dark silken hair.

“Can I lick you?” he asked her tenderly.

She couldn’t speak, only nodded.

Hei gently parted her thighs, inhaling the musky scent of her arousal. She tried to close her legs and he allowed her to. To help her relax again, he feathered small open-mouthed kisses across her thighs and in the warm bend behind her knee. His fingertips gently stroked the soft patch of silvery hair just above her virginal sex. Finally, she relaxed again and allowed him to part her legs. Gently, he teased her, kissing and licking just the insides of her warm thighs without ever bringing his lips to her throbbing sex. 

“Ready?” he asked her.

“Please.”

He gently drew a long slow lick through her wet folds, his tongue pressing at her sensitive pearl so that her hips lifted desperately to meet him mouth. Her fingers were threaded through his hair, holding on to him like a lifeline. Tenderly, Hei added a finger into her moist cavern to accompany his lips and tongue until she was melting in his arms. Small sounds escaped her throat, gasps and whimpers of pleasure intermingled with his name.

When her first orgasm rocked her, she screamed out his name so that it echoed against the walls of the inn.

She lay on the sheets, gasping in pleasure, and Hei wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He smiled down at her. She was so beautiful, so pale and thin and feminine. She was so very much like a porcelain doll left behind from an earlier century. Without asking anything from her, he lay down beside her, adjusting his legs in such a way that she wouldn’t be able to feel his hard erection. He cradled her naked body against his own, kissing her forehead and the side of her face.

“Hei,” she whispered when she was able to breathe again.

“Yes Yin?”

“What about you?”

“I’m alright.”

She ran her hand over his crotch, feeling the hardness there.

“It’s okay, Yin. You don’t have to.”

She rolled over to face him, her eyes bright. “But, I want to be with you completely.”

“You’re sure?”

She nodded. “Yes, Hei.”

He kissed her gently, his tongue probing her mouth open and delving into her. 

He felt her face wrinkle up at the taste of herself and pulled away. 

“Yin?” he asked.

“I’m sorry. It tastes strange.”

He smiled at her, stroking her hair back from her face. “It’s you, Yin.”

“Me?”

Hei kissed her cheek. “We don’t have to—”

“Can I taste you?” she asked him.

His blue eyes glimmered, widening. Then, he blushed. “If… if you want to…”

She nodded. 

Hei pulled off his boxers and laid them aside with the clothing he had removed from her body. Then, he pressed his naked body tightly against hers so she could feel his erection pressing against her lower stomach. Her hands ran down his chest, exploring the plains of his muscled body until she reached something she had never touched before. Yin had seen Hei naked plenty of times to tend his injuries and he had seen her as well, but his body had never seemed so hard as it did the moment her hands wrapped around his erection.

A small gasp of surprise escaped her. Experimentally, she ran her palm over the weeping head and then ran down to the base, her fingers curling lightly around him. His skin was hot and as soft as living velvet, slightly sticky, and strange, but she found she loved the way he felt in her hand. Small sounds of pleasure came from Hei’s mouth, urging her on. Gently, she toyed with the heavy sacs of flesh she found beneath his hard organ and squeezed them tenderly. 

Then, she kissed Hei again, tasting herself. 

When she pulled away, she wasted no time kissing his body as he had hers. She went right to where her hand was wrapped around him. Gingerly, she licked the weeping head of him. He was salty and vaguely unpleasant, but she wrapped her lips and tongue around him anyway. He had been able to taste her and she had tasted strange as well. But she couldn’t fit all of him inside her mouth no matter how hard she tired. Even when the head of him was pressing at the back of her throat, there was still much she couldn’t reach.

“Hei,” she whispered. “You’re big.”

He flushed, his cheeks pink.

Yin lifted her chin to kiss him and Hei eagerly met her lips regardless of where her mouth had just been. He ran his hands down her back, pressing her hot body against his erection so that she could feel just how badly he wanted to be with her. As if only sensing what to do next, she spread her legs and wrapped them around his hips. The head of him pressed against her wet entrance, but he hesitated. He kissed her, touching her ribcage gently with his rough hands.

“Are you sure, Yin?”

“Yes.”

“Alright. I’m going to enter you.”

She nodded, but she looked unsure. Hei’s erection was so large and Yin’s body was so small. What if he didn’t fit inside her?

They had been lying on their sides, tangled together facing each other, but Hei rolled Yin onto her back and supported his weight above her on his elbows. Her legs were wrapped around his narrow hips and she stared up at him with her eyes wide and almost tragic-looking. She looked a little afraid, only in her eyes though. The rest of her face was blank, doll-like. He gently parted her slick lips with his fingers and began to enter her slowly. For the first time, he saw expression of pain on her face. Tears gathered in the corners of her pale eyes.

“Do you want to stop?”

She pressed her fingers to her mouth and smiled.

He kissed her forehead. “Alright.”

She lifted her chin and captured his mouth, kissing him deeply. Hei felt the barrier of her virginity and knew he was going to hurt her. Gently, he gripped her small hips and thrust forward to break past her hymen. She yelped in pain, but he swallowed her cries. For a long moment, he just rested inside her small body, feeling her hot tight walls constricting around him, even though he wanted nothing more than to begin to thrust into her.

“I’m alright,” Yin breathed finally.

“Are you sure?”

She nodded.

“I’ll move now, okay?”

Yin kissed him.

Hei began to move, slowly at first, but increasing his pace as Yin began to gasp his name and cling to him. Her legs wrapped around his waist tightly, her arms clutching him close. Every inch of their naked skin was pressed together as they made love, mingling like they were one person. Hei’s fingers ran down her body, teasing her nipples and her sensitive pearl until she was shivering against him in pleasure. She gasped his name, but then tried to push his hands away.

“It’s going to… happen again…” she gasped.

Hei smiled at her. “An orgasm?”

Yin cried out as he teased her clit.

“Go ahead,” he said and kissed her.

“But… I want to come with you.”

Hei’s heart skipped a beat. “Don’t worry. I’m not far behind.” 

Then, he kissed her deeply, his tongue matching the pace he set below. His fingers were rough and strong, teasing her body to its peak easily. He felt her orgasm start deep inside her womb and travel through her, her muscles clenching rhythmically around him. He was brought to the edge by her pleasure and spilled his warm seed deep inside her small body. Then, he collapsed beside her, panting as he cradled her naked body against his own.

They lay like that long enough for him to soften inside her and slide out. 

She felt warm and wet inside and pressed one hand to her abdomen. “Hei,” she whispered. “What if I have a child?”

He squeezed her close. “I’ll protect you. I won’t let anything bad happen to you. We’ll always be together.”

Yin nodded. “I’d like that,” she whispered into his bare chest, listening to his breath.

“You should sleep, Yin,” he murmured.

She nodded.

Then, she nestled against him, naked and warm, and he felt all the dark memories of having sex with Luciella begin to wash away. They were all replaced with this one night with Yin, with her trust in him and her small tight body wrapped around him. Hei hugged her close, sighing, and then slept as well.

…X:X:X…

The next morning, Yin woke before Hei. After spending a moment in his arms, she crawled out of the bed to shower and get dressed. There was some blood on her thighs and on the sheets. She had really been with Hei last night—it hadn’t been a dream after all. She tried to smile, but she needed her fingers to manage it. 

Black.

White.

She had always thought that if she finally managed to be with Hei like that, it would be forceful and rough. Hei was a Contractor after all. But she had no idea how gentle and tender he could be. He had been so loving last night, kissing her and holding her, putting her pleasure first. It was almost like a dream.

Beneath the water of the shower, she decided that Hei really was neither black nor dark grey, but a shade of grey closer to white than she had ever realized.

…X:X:X…

Outside, the sunlight was buttery and warm. The ocean was like a sheet of blue glass. The beach umbrellas looked like candy, casting deep cool shadows. The manager of the inn was waiting behind the desk, petting one of his black cats, and he smiled at the young couple when they walked downstairs from their room. “How was your honeymoon last night?” he asked, smiling at them.

Hei blushed furiously, his mouth opening and closing. Had they really been that loud? 

But Yin merely said plainly, “Yes. It was wonderful.”

**X:Shades:X:of:X:Grey:X**

Questions, comments, concerns?

And, drum roll please, we are finished!

Here we go. Very important author's note:

First, drop a review and let me know what you think! Are the characters way out of character? Does everybody hate Yin because she’s so hard to write? Think I tormented Hei too much? Are permanently disgusted and can no longer even watch Darker than Black thanks to me? Loved it? Hated it? Are scared for life because of the thought of Hei being molested? Think there was way too much sex, fluff, and romance? (Flames will be used to roast marshmallows and weenies!) Think I need to do more editing before I post chapters? Post to slow? Chapters are too short? Too long? Yada, yada, yada…

Second, I own nothing except my original characters: though none were in this story. I also own my plot, though not so much in this story! So there, now I can't be sued!

Third, there will be no sequel… at all, so don't ask!

Fourth, check out my first ORIGINAL NOVEL! **The Breaking of Poisonwood by Paradise Avenger.** (Summary: People were dead. When Skye Davis bought me at a slave auction as a birthday present for his brother, I had no idea what my new life was going to be like, but I had never expected this. It all started when Venus de Luna was killed and I was to take her place, to become the new savior… Then, bad things happened and some people died. In the heart of the earth, we discovered the ancient being that Frank Davis had found and created and used to his advantage. The Poisonwood—)

Finally, thank you for making it this far! All the way to the end! Woot! Yay!

And so, I bid you adieu.

REVIEW!


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